"Bright Future" awaits for the Aussies after the Ashes

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Robin Soderling

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  • "Bright Future" awaits for the Aussies after the Ashes

“Bright future” waits for the “Aussies” after the Ashes

Ashes series is now over and with it careers of some of the players of the Australian side. After giving a hugely disappointed show during the Ashes series, it seems all the energies of the Australian players has hit rock bottom and now they are left with 0 talent. But one wonders where the mighty Aussies would take their talent less faces to as after their performance in the Ashes series it seems no Organization would be willing to offer them a job, and those who will offer them one would not be higher than the “blue collar” ones. But the question remains what would become of our dear Aussies, who at one stage labeled themselves as the Best of the best. But the “best of the best” are now at the mercy of the selectors who will decide that which player would stay and which would leave the team.

We start our predictions with Ricky Ponting, who had a disastrous Ashes series, and is desperately seeking some job to make a decent living. Ricky Ponting is most likely to be found selling “black tickets” outside a cinema hall or a cricket ground.  Ponting is quite good in making remarks and comments, and made number of comments regarding the form of Pietersen before the Ashes series. Ponting would gather customers by wearing a “juggler hat” and would be shouting in his cocky style, “10 $’s “ “10 $’s”. We wouldn’t be too much amazed if his first customer would be Kevin Pietersen, as Pietersen would be quite desperate to buy a ticket for his wife, who would have come to see his macho man in action for the one day series. He would opt Ponting because he would like to see some discount from his past buddy and it would not be amazing if he is able to get a ticket for 9 or 8$.

Then comes Marcus North, the way Mr North has played in the Ashes series one hopes his luck would save him of not being send to the “North Pole”. Poor Performance deserves poor job and we would not be amazed if we found North selling “Balloons” and “toys” outside Sydney harbor. What a scene it would be, North too desperate to make his living by selling some balloons and toys. But those will not be some ordinary toys, the toys would be of characters like the “Hulk” and “Captain Planet” as these are the characters which North could hope of becoming in his career but sadly he is “far from Heaven” of achieving this level. The balloons will have picture of those shots which he played for boundaries during his batting flops in the Ashes series.

Now comes the turn of Mr Doug Bollinger. Once a “bully” always a bully, but after his flops in Ashes series this Bully has no “dog fight” left inside of him.  But, nah, this cutie pie has not given up and it seems he is using his fighting nature for something else, “Cock Fights”. Yes, for the first time in Australia we will be seeing a cock fight and it would not be some ordinary cock fight, some well fed cocks will be fighting in it. Poor Bollinger for his own satisfaction would name one as “Australia” and one as “England”. And, 1,2,3, the fight starts and it seems in the cock fight too,  Australia has lost. Bollinger is no ordinary man, and he would an escape plan as soon as the police would arrive. His cocks are too precious and he would have fed them with good roaster food.

How can we forget our hero, our lover, the stylish Mr Michael Clarke. Michael Calrke is one heartbroken kid, and this not only goes for his batting but also for his personal relations. He was involved in a terrible breakup with some Australian model in 2009 and it did leave some scars on the Aussie vice captain.

Looking at his sensitive side one think he would be fit to sing “romantic songs” in the streets of Melbourne and we wouldn’t be amazed if we catch him singing “Hey there Delilah, what it’s like in New York City, I am a thousand miles away from you but tonight you look so pretty, oh yes you do….. We again wouldn’t be too amazed if Clarke would change the lyrics and turn them as “Hey there Ashes trophy, what it’s like in London City, you are 1000 miles away from us but tonight you look so pretty, oh yes you do… Such is the impact, Ashes loss will leave on the Aussies as there is a high chance that most of their players would end up as some “waiter” in a bar or even worse end up in “rehab”. May Lord have mercy on the Aussies.  

 

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